Dealing with Toxic People
Many of you will know that I run a private Facebook Group (open to anyone who shares our vision) called Living on Purpose 2018. In it, we had a discussion on dealing with toxic people, we decided as a group to create a document which would help our younger females (in particular, but not exclusively) to deal with toxic people and relationships.
I feel strongly about this, as I this topic isn’t taught in school. I imagine that most parents do not speak about it with their children, so the way we often learn about these people (who are essentially hurt and consequently hurt others to make themselves feel better), is by developing relationships with them.
It is my aim to make this a conversation that takes place more frequently, not just with young women but with everyone. Perhaps when it is more out in the open these people will become more aware of their actions and change for the better or at the very least more folks know what to do when they meet a toxic being.
Pshychologytoday.com have a great article on how to spot toxic people. For now, I will give you the list we complied on how to deal with them. Feel free to add your own rules in the comments section. Here goes:
- If at all possible avoid them. Cut them off! They do not deserve your time.
- Avoid getting bogged down in detail. Often their tactic is to blind you in confusion. Stay focused on the goal.
- Choose your battles wisely. It’s not always worth getting into an argument. Toxic people tend to thrive on drama.
- However, don’t let them get away with bad behaviour. They often prey on people they perceive to be weak. Therefore, show them that you will not tolerate their crap.
- Constantly work on your self-esteem and self-worth. If you are self-assured, you won’t let others undermine you.
- Ignore attention seeking behaviour. They will often try to draw attention to themselves to lure you into their web of deceit.
- Don’t be sucked in by a sob story. There’s nothing wrong with feeling sorry for someone but it is not your responsibility to get your hands dirty and help fix them. You can’t anyway, only they can fix themselves.